XshaDowEr

Moments of 2011

2011-12-31T14:47:00.002+08:00

Well as usual every year, i am gonna summarize what i have felt and experience over this year, and whether i have changed for the better or worse. let's start off:

January Quote of the month: MOVING ON.
The year.. started off slowly. i wasn't quite happy with where i am, who i was at this point in time. was wondering what am i doing in hockey. didn't get enough playing time because syamirul was playing all the time. got so emotional and pissed off at times but i didn't want to say anything. was at an initial stage of moving on, hated school because of the people there, but things slowly changed.

February Quote of the month: Love takes time to blossom
things started to pick up in this month for the team, but not for myself. we were promoted to the premier league, and it was like a dream come true. chinese new year was the usual affair, with steamboat and etc. didnt do visiting because it was not in my family's tradition to do so. so less connections in Singapore anyway. was halfway through moving on. and at this point of time i realized that being single can do wonders. i realized that love will slowly blossom, and you cannot rush it.

march Quote of the month: PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE.
not much happened in this month, because of school holidays. a chalet between my close friends was organized, and we had total fun. i didn't understand why but i totally didn't like going to poly and meeting fake people. but what i did not realize was that it was my own problem that i hated meeting these people. i couldn't adapt.
i was pretty much involved in hockey, until the point that i got so pissed off i couldn't get enough playing time.

April Quote of the month: CONTINUE BELIEVING.
the month when school starts.
this was the month when i decided to change that little stinkish attitude of mine.
gradually accepted the way things are, and how things go. slowly took time to understand the fundamentals of how things works, and not all of them will go smoothly for you.
and yes, for the first time in 5 years, double finals for teck whye secondary school hockey! was over the moon, shed tears of joy when my secondary school beat seng kang in an emotional penalty shootout.
this was the month i moved on fully. couldn't help but laugh at my foolishness during the past year and the few months.
started training for my upcoming marathon at the end of may. didn't know what to expect because i was just a beginner. who knows what life changing moments it has brought upon me?
started having a crush, but didn't want to let anybody know because it was a personal secret. haha.

May Quote of the month: BE BRAVE TO PULL YOURSELF UP.
this month was the most EXCITING AND EXHILARATING MONTH OF MY LIFE.
marathon training was in full swing, but i missed hockey a little. training was cancelled due to exams, but i started to see the opportunities in the horizon due to cancelled trainings.
the end of the month was.. indescribable.
i completed my first marathon of my whole life, and i didn't even dare dream of completing it. this marathon changed the way how i look at life and people, and i started changing my mindset about hockey.

June Quote of the month: EMBRACE YOUR DREAMS, AND NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, NEVER LET IT GO.
as time went on, things and statuses started improving and improving.
i was totally enjoying my life, i couldn't be more happy than my previous years.
amazing friends from all walks of life, be it my secondary school or polytechnic clique, i had them all.
i dreamt a bold dream. a very big one.
100km in 2 years.

July Quote of the month: TOMORROW MIGHT BE TOO LATE, BECAUSE TOMORROW MIGHT NEVER COME.
this was typically, and basically.. my month.
i didn't want to ask for much, and didn't expect much.
but what i got totally surprised me, and i couldn't believed my eyes.
the care and concern from my friends; primary school to polytechnic level, really changed my perspective about everyone.
i'd rather have 20 quality friends than 100 friends who know nothing about me.
i dreamt of that bold dream again, and couldn't get it off my mind.
signed up for the second marathon of my life, and was totally PUMPED up for it.

August Quote of the month: HALFWAY THROUGH THIS EDUCATIONAL MARATHON.
education on every level is like a marathon.
there are several ups and down during your run, and you got to learn how to overcome every obstacle that you face, be it cramps in your legs, be it dehydration or fatigue.
this educational marathon was taking a toll of my body, and a break was really needed.
learnt about the overseas disney attachment, and didn't really delved much into it until i learnt the experiences that you can get.

September Quote of the month: PROVE TO NO ONE, BUT YOURSELF, BECAUSE THE GREATEST ENEMY IS YOURSELF.
this month was great.
hockey POL-ITEs was starting, and the 2.4km test was compulsory.
came in ontop among my team mates, especially those national players.
felt an adrenaline rush after the run, and was really proud of myself because i beat the run in 9:21.
i had no one to prove to, except for myself.

October Quote of the month: I DO NOT NEED A RELIGION, SPORTS IS MY RELIGION.
Got the confirmation that i was going to USA for my attachment.
was thinking of the 2 semesters of virtual non-visibility that was gonna happen in 2012.
got pissed off at someone's tweet just because i posted a picture of the distance i have clocked in 3 months.
i just couldn't understand why people can't keep bullshit to themselves, and talk shit about other people enjoying things they do.

November Quote of the month: COURAGE IS RESISTANCE OF FEAR, MASTERY OF FEAR, NOT THE ABSENCE OF FEAR.
didn't blogged at all during november.
however i was busy with my marathon training.
was busy clocking 50km per week.
completed my first 10km with alvin kang, and it was fun because i learnt how to encourage people positively. positiveness rubs on to other people, and its contagious.
had several rounds of interviews for my USA attachment, and i got through them with ease.

December Quote of the month: THERE ARE NO SHORTCUTS TO PLACES WORTH GOING.
enough said. completed my second marathon of my life, and of the year.
i dared to dream, and i dared to conquer. i dreamt of the bold dream again, and had a bigger dream. completing 120 marathons before i die.
after the marathon, i learnt a lot.
how to be patient.
how to be understanding.
how to accept people the way they are.
and how people change because of the decisions they make.

this Moments of 2011 pretty much sums up my life in 2011.
it has passed pretty well, and i can say that i now have a more positive outlook in life.
hockey is still my passion, however, i play it for enjoyment and i shall not bring myself down emotionally anymore when i concede goals, or am left on the bench.
the past is the past, and what matters is the present, the future.
people come and people go, however what matters is the people who stay.
sports is for life, and sports is my passion.
tomorrow might be too late because tomorrow might never come.
i aim to get a group of 5 marathoners one day, and we will conquer marathons around the world no matter what we are doing in life.
i hope to make the confession in 2013, because i know i can.
and as for the 100km... i can see it slowly coming to fruition, and time will tell.
i will keep having bold dreams about it because i DARE.

2012 will be a GREAT year, and i look forward to the marathons that i might be able to take part in next year. i look forward to the u-21 tournament, and i look forward to my attachment. last but not least, i treasure all the times i have with my friends and family, and i will never let go no matter how tough life will get; because tough times do not last, only tough people do.

have a great year ahead everyone!

merry christmas

2011-12-25T10:32:00.002+08:00

moments of 2011 coming up on 31 december.
it's been... a good year. better than 2011.
since it's improved, lets improve it again next year.
things will always get better.
merry christmas everyone.

2nd marathon

2011-12-05T21:13:00.002+08:00

After yesterday's marathon, i learnt a lot.
that i should try to be in other people's perspectives once in a while to understand what they are going through, and what they do.
that i should try to accept people the way they are because that's who they are, and it is much better.
that it is mind over substance, and nothing can break you, even if it is the most fearful mountain, the most fearful road, the tallest indescribable building.

a marathon is not something everyone can attempt, and i am really glad that i have come this far in life, and there is no point looking back because what lies in the future, matters the most. i am gonna make every moment last, and every moment count, because life is like this.

there are no shortcuts to anywhere worth going, and we can't be lazy in everything we do. i feel very satisfied that i paced my brother to finish his first marathon, even though i finished at a time lousier than my previous timing of 6 hours.

blood's thicker than water and it is what goes on during the process of the run, and the end process that counts. i cannot wait to complete more marathons, and eventually, the 100km run that's in my mind all this while.

running's my passion.
running's an addiction.

2 semesters of virtually non-visibility

2011-10-27T16:37:00.002+08:00

1 semester of going overseas for an attachment,
and not seeing my poly friends for that period of time is already enough.
but another semester of them heading to their respective attachments while we come back is just too much to handle.
i wont get to see you and everybody else for this period of time.

ah well.
life goes on.
school has started off pretty well, with so many things to look forward to.
so many events
so many upcoming moments

moments to capture.
moments to savor.
moments to share.

it's just 4 months before 2 semesters of virtual non-visibility.
but life goes on.

can't wait for my second and the subsequent marathons that i am going to attempt in life.

Dreams

2011-10-10T09:04:00.004+08:00

i have so many dreams.
i have so many aspirations.
i have so much to look forward to in life.

such is life.
i do not let my life be controlled and dictated by a non-existent and supposedly higher order or power. i do not let them affect the decisions that i want to make in life, and i do not allow them to influence what or why i want to do whatever that i look forward to in life.

such is life.
life is great, life is amazing. i am independent, carefree and most of all, i respect my parents. i want to do things that very few people my age would do, and i dare to dream big. people who have their life attached to a single entity cannot do this, and they live only in a world where they cannot think out of the box, where they cannot dream big and live big.

such is life.
my life doesn't revolve solely around running. if running is a turnoff to several of you, then you have not lived life at all, because sports is life, and sports makes life so much more entertaining and exciting.

sports gives us focus.
sports teaches us determination
sports preaches resilience.
sports instills pride in an individual, in a team.
sports is the mother of discipline.

focus so that we can be on the right track and achieve whatever we want in life
determination so that we do not give up and try again every time we fall down
resilience because the saying goes; touch times do not last, tough people do
PRIDE, because we are able to take pride in whatever we do, LIKE ME, IN RUNNING, IN HOCKEY.
and lastly, DISCIPLINE. sports do not involve people whose life revolve around sports. sports involve alike individuals who have fixed routines that they themselves have generated so as to stay fit, to set a certain standard to their everyday tasks.

to conclude, I DO NOT NEED A RELIGION.
SPORTS IS A RELIGION.
SPORTS IS LIFE.
SPORTS IS FOCUS.

SUCH IS LIFE.

proving.

2011-09-21T22:43:00.002+08:00

long time no blog.
just have several things to say.
good semester results. i know i can do it, and i know can keep it up.
good 2.4km today. 9 minutes 20 seconds. shows the training i have done.
because i followed one mantra.

i dont have anything to prove to anybody.
the greatest enemy is myself, and i must prove to myself that i can improve and become better at every attempt.
its all in the mind and i cannot let the slightest things bother me.
bother what i want in life.

i am only human and there are so many other people greater than me.
i strive to improve every single day, and one day achieve something big like those high achievers.

the previous year and the earlier part of this year was different.
running has changed my mindset, and set me on the path to what i want to do.
which people i want to be with.

running is great.
running is zen.
running is my religion,
running is an addiction.

halfway through this educational marathon

2011-08-21T20:41:00.002+08:00

Exams are over.
Second year semester 1.
So many things have happened and pass.

Its a good sem!
So many things im looking forward to;attachment, graduation
More marathons and an ultra marathon.
National service too.

Theres something deep inside i wanna say but i gotta keep it til the end of year 3.
Dont know the outcome of doing so though.

Im just going to continue keeping my dreams close to me and embrace them.
No matter what happens i will never let it go, and continue living life to the fullest by doing what i love and what i want.
Life is short. And i hope that day comes when i get to say what i really want to.

Enjoy the holidays!

feeling

2011-08-08T20:47:00.003+08:00

i just felt like blogging.
and a reassurance to all readers, this blog won't die.

this semester ended last friday.
4 months just passed like this, and now i am going to take another semester exam.
it feels like last week that i last took my semester 2 exam.

a good 13km run with alvin kang today.
just wanted to continue and continue.

and what happens if i go USA next year?
i'd surely miss everyone dearly.
and here i am hoping .. goes together.
6 months is the shit man.
haha.

and anw, lets take it 1 step at a time.
i want to play div 2 u-21 next year, and also division 2 with the boys who just came back from hockey. im not gonna rush. and i hope i will be back before the league starts, which is impossible =/.

amazing 18th.

2011-07-10T12:40:00.004+08:00

my birthday...
i didn't really expect and ask for much for my friends.
i thought just a wish will do, cause i don't really like attention.
buttttttttt, what every of them did was amazing.

from treats to surprises to gifts. i am really thankful i have such amazing people around me.
i am grateful to have this life, and i don't mind living this life again to experience all this.

really feel so happy still knowing my 3 greatest primary school friends for 8-12 years.
really feel so relieved that whatever problems our secondary school cliques have, are solved within a few days through understanding.
really feel so grateful to my poly clique for what they have done for me.

hahaha time to buy toto because BAI LIU LI BAIIIIIIIIIII HUI BU HUI KAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

best.

2011-06-28T18:48:00.002+08:00

i keep thinking about next year's sundown 100km.
what would it feel like to seriously complete it?
wearing the shirt all around - school, hockey.
HAHAHAHAHAHAH OH MAN.

the best gift i would like?
just register me in the SCM!
thats the best gift ever in my opinion now.

tomorrow might be too late

2011-06-07T21:41:00.003+08:00

i got to give my best for today, everyday, because tomorrow might never come.

3 years in poly is like a marathon.
im about 17.5km through, and my mind is starting to play tricks and games with me.
cramps are starting to come up.
but i just got to push through because eventually i will be crossing that line.
eventually ill be wearing that shirt with pride.
because i can.

be brave to pull yourself up

2011-05-29T14:41:00.005+08:00

ran my first ever marathon last night.
completed it in 6 hours.
my thoughts about it? there's always a hand to pull you up when you're drowning, when you're down.

the first 21km was alright, but subsequently i was fighting the mental presence in my mind, telling me to go to sleep, to give it all up. i continued walking with cramps in my thigh, i just didn't want to give it all up.

i finally sat down at the 25km mark. i lost all hope of completing it before my 5am bus arrived, and just decided to continue walking and run when i have the strength. just when i was about to get up to continue walking, the group of pacers i have been waiting for appeared. it was like i was given a new chance to take on the marathon, and complete it in 6 hours.
i gladly took the hand that pulled me up, and continued the last 17km with the 6 hours pacers.
i was truly inspired by the man i was running with, mr mohan.
he's one of the smaller figures out there whom we do not know about, but he truly has a big heart, and he is definitely a great person.
126 marathons and counting. and he's 51.

it was truly an exhilarating experience completing 42 kilometers, constantly battling your mind.
i have learnt a lot from this and am truly determined to run more marathons.

like i always say and i will forever remember, it's all in the mind.
thank you mr mohan.

school starts

2011-05-02T01:16:00.004+08:00

school has started.
and i am starting to appreciate the people around me.
i try not to get angsty, and i try to stay calm.
and i really like how i do it, though i may suck at times.

i browsed through my friendster account, just because i felt random.
a picture really tells a thousand words.

i really need that hockey training right now.
self-running is fun, though you cant enjoy it with friends who will go through the same training and pull you through it.
i cant wait for end of year 3, when graduation comes again.
everything comes and goes, its how you are ready to grab the opportunity when it comes, thats the key points in life.

different

2011-04-22T23:16:00.003+08:00

everything feels so different.
its only been a year but things seem to have changed.
it feels so damn fucking different without hockey trainings.
but i guess the break is needed.

i am starting to appreciate my polytechnic friends i guess.
i love my clique though we don't seem to go out often.
maybe that's what happens when i keep talking bad about my poly life.

i need that hockey training right now.
and i don't want to miss a single day w/o my clique. or w/o my secondary school friends.

im still not mature enough lol. so much naivety and so gullible. nvm things will change soon. this feeling will change soon enough woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

back to scho

2011-04-15T22:09:00.003+08:00

Somewhere inside me
i want school to start
But i also dont want school to start.

Cause i wish i can just drama and hockey.
If only my life like that ah!
Hahaha but reading through several comments
studies and career come first so yea.

Gg i got some kinda feeling when im around. . .

2011-04-01T19:24:00.005+08:00

Im in seventh heaven
words cant describe what i am feeling.
After 4 hard fought years from the hockey boys.
FOR THE FIRST FUCKING TIME.
DOUBLE FINALS FOR TWSS!

B BOYS AND GIRLS.
congrats.
Its an all teck whye affair.

One last thing.
Im glad im still in hockey.
Im glad im single.
I saw her tweets.
And cant help but laugh at her emotions.
Anyway, good luck with yourself.

just a dream.

2011-03-10T15:42:00.003+08:00

good chalet.
had so much fun ps3ing, mono dealing, blackjack.
being random, scolding people for fun.
ahahaha.

way better than hanging out with my poly friends by 3-5x?
at least i can be myself for.
no way you can pretend to be another person.

beep test this saturday.
and i guess im still fit.
premier starts on saturday too.

some things can never ever be obtained

2011-02-23T23:46:00.003+08:00

such things include several things in life i want but can never get.

but without hockey, im nobody, i will be no where, i wouldn't have got to know so many wonderful people in hockey. well though i meet the fair share of idiots.

we are in the premier league,
and i feel delighted because it was 3 years ago that we got pwned badly by jansenites in the u-21, 19-0 if im not wrong, and its only 6-0 this year, could have been 6-4.

i feel delighted also because i can do my exams with ease, without any difficulty,
though i dont know what grades i would get.

i gotta be patient some times.
though i may lose my head at the slightest things

im missing every moment of secondary school.
im not enjoying polytechnic. lets hope next sem brings a better year.

1st post of cny

2011-02-05T03:02:00.002+08:00

1st post of chinese new year.
and im sexcited for march.
1)we got word we are playing in the premier league this march
2)chalet in march
3)holidays in march
4)change class next sem
5)more hockey <3

cny... usual affair, not doing visitings and such.
but time well-spent with family though i am a bit angsty at times.
steamboat 4 days straight? lmao.
i love my dad most of all.

and when we learn to let go, we learn to confront all
thats my motto for this year.
i have learnt to let go on 2 important things. you and you.
that's when i learn to confront all.

if fate allows we will meet again.

my rainy days

2011-01-29T23:57:00.002+08:00

its a good day today.
nice rain and all.

i totally don't get how the national coaches are thinking, and the way they talk to people.
seriously, if you want development of hockey, aren't you spoiling their chances of going through the process by taking away my chance of playing? i am already not in the national team and my chance of playing is already so low.
seriously to hell with the coaching course.
if i didn't pay for it, i would already have fucking skipped it.

on a positive note, i am happy to hear many of my previous year o level friends getting into the polytechnics they want, albeit some failing to get into their courses.
however all i want to say is embrace your dreams, and hold it close to you. cause you never know what might happen.
your wildest dreams might just come knocking at your door tomorrow.
just like how it did the other time, and i wasted it

anyway, chinese new year is coming, and i hope to pass it well, unlike last year.

Hockey season starts all over agn

2011-01-10T11:05:00.002+08:00

First post ever since the new year.
U-21 started on 8 jan saturday.
Down 3-1 but came back 3-3.

Didnt get to play, but aint disappointed cause we did well.
Chalet for hum and ol after that.
Dam fun to be arnd ppl i have known for v long.

Thrilling week starts today.
Im gonna do it.
Ntnl trials mon and wed
Nyp ivp floorball tues and thurs.
Projects here and there.

I guess im getting crazier each year.
Lets go.

moments of 2010.

2010-12-31T01:02:00.003+08:00

January
the year started.
and i guess i did nothing much, but worked at shangrila and everything.
hockey continues, with my injury still on.
received my O lvl results.
was ontop of the world. didnt know what to apply for.
found out farhan, syamirul, rahim couldnt play B boys. everyone got emotional.
February
yeap, hockey continues. i grew muscular i guess.
and thats when i found out that it was 1 year already.
bad cny. got probs here and there.
b boys aint doing so good. aint coping well.
March
got my poly posting results.
did everything to start poly.
questioned my faith again.
questioned myself, my love.
happy playing with m2.
nth much.
April
hated my shin
hated smoking
talked about moving on.
talked about winning medals.
poly started, and thats where it all goes.
May
i thought i had changed myself by finding someone new.
i dreamt about my past hockey days, my secondary school days.
i made newer friends.
June
condolences to lq. hard to take, i felt it before.
had dinner with boon,faizal,arena,shermaine.
felt stress and everything.
July
my month.
amazing friends gave me wishes, gave me presents.
what i was waiting for didnt come. i was heartbroken.
but what to do.
annoyed by a person called chris in my class.
i thought i was over the moon. i thought not.
August
i cant sleep.
i dreamt of yog.
i dreamt of you.
all gone to waste.
September
i started deproving in goalkeeping.
i started dreaming more and more.
it wasnt meant to be i guess.
all the right moves, i cant execute.
October
i aimed to improve.
i thought i was in cloud 9,
but its just a fantasy. so stupid to have started it.
November
WON POL-ITE. dedicated it to amirul.
got 3rd in div 2. dedicated it again.
then everything crashed down on my face.
December
things turned out awry. had a great KL trip.
but i guess things wont go back the way they are.
i found out typically on the last day of 2010.
what a heartbreaking moment.

to summarise 2010, i had an ok year.
i guess things turn out awry, fuck up everytime.
you wont always get what you want, else life aint exciting.
we all have to work to get what we want to get. i didnt.
i shouldnt complain. i send my blessings, but not from the bottom of my heart because like what i said last year, it'd really pains me to see you go with another guy.

its ironic how i did it to another one, and the same thing happens.
what goes around comes around. retribution, call it what you may.

to conclude, my heart is dead. ct2010 is dead. you wont see the same him no more.

BOA TO THE MAX.

i shouldn't,

2010-12-30T21:56:00.003+08:00

i shouldn't have took a peek at your phone.
seeing that photo
seeing that message

hurts ttm.
i guess i got what i deserved.
for not cherishing.
for not appreciating.

what goes around comes around.

moments of 2010, tmr

2010-12-30T11:42:00.001+08:00

moments of 2010 posted tmr.
reflection on so many things gonna come up. :)

551th post. but lets change it to 550.

2010-12-24T00:55:00.004+08:00

550 dedicated to you.
happy birthday shermaine:).

have a good day and a merry christmas.

i want to turn back time so badly.

550th

2010-12-21T00:37:00.001+08:00

its 3 days to your birthday.
i havent forgotten.

i hope you do see this anyway.
see you soon too.

it never was, and it never will be.

2010-12-13T23:43:00.002+08:00

i guess things turn out awry every time.
i didn't and don't always cherish time i have with people, things i have, people i have.

maybe i should start now.
just maybe.
i will start by having faith again.

you too should move on.
because i really am not worth it,
and am destined to be single i guess.

so it all goes back to 2007 again.

recurring

2010-11-28T11:19:00.004+08:00

recurring dreams happen at a particular time every month, usually towards the end of the month.

i miss secondary school.
i miss everything.

at least our hockey is starting to improve.
3rd in men's div 2, from 2nd last last year
what to do. press on then.

whatever i promise, its always not fulfilled.
im sorry.

lets move on.

semifinal

2010-11-20T00:02:00.000+08:00

won POLITE.
now div 2 semi.
lets win.
lets just win.

kpop night

2010-10-24T14:24:00.002+08:00

unforgettable feeling.
omg seeing BIGBANG live was like listening to haru haru 1000 times.

i dont know wheres the link but OMGWTFBBQ HAHAHAHA
and i am really happy.

everything is going well and improving :).
hockey especially.
cant wait to win POLYITEs this year.

i will carry out my promise as intended.
to amirul hafiq. :)

nearly.

2010-10-05T11:18:00.001+08:00

i nearly forgot my password into blogger.
damned.

ah well.
i guess i just have to stay positive.
and work and train harder.
im just that lousy

but im gonna improve.

i just

2010-09-26T17:14:00.003+08:00

i recently read my previous blog posts, and found out i haven't been following what i decided at the last day of last year.

and i guess i am not improving in hockey, because i can't even play for 15 minutes in division 2 now.
what a shame la haha.

tooooooooooooooooo bad i just suck.

why.

2010-09-13T21:29:00.001+08:00

Naze kanojo wa hyōji sa reru yōdesu ka?
Watashi wa idō shite inai?
Yume, Gūzen...
Yoide wanai toki ni wa jibun jishin o suru.

loooooong time

2010-09-08T20:36:00.002+08:00

i dont want this blog to die leh haha.
its like 5 years since i have this blog liao.

anyway exams tomorrow are going to be over.
but i dont think i got study also LOL.

but can pass la :).

anyway umpiring own! own to the max!
$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
woot woot i shall secure my future better with more courses like coaching course.

time

2010-08-27T20:26:00.000+08:00

i wish i was in an inception.

memories.

2010-08-19T04:32:00.002+08:00

i just cant sleep.
not because of insomnia. but because that i cry missing those tiny fragments of memories i had with everyone. i dreamt of puay ling, who reminded me of whom i was when i was secondary 2, a sibei shy person towards the people that i like, like a person living in a cave stalking them every time lol. i woke up and realized that i am starting to miss everything that i had savored in life.
those tiny fragments of memories that are etched deep in my heart.
whether big or small events, heart breaking moments, glorifying events.
i can remember them all.
i just feel like crying because if i were to live life again, i want my whole life right now, to rewind and play itself again.
17 years of life and i have noticed so many changes in everybody.
i miss the days in primary school.
i miss the days in secondary two, secondary four.
i miss secondary school so much.
i miss secondary school hockey so much.
i just miss everything yo.

if only i could just sleep and wake up now, realizing i have gone back 4 years back in time. i would change somethings, but certain things would be left untouched.

time is so cruel yo.
time flies like how we take small little things that we do with each other for granted, and expect the same thing to happen the day after.
sometimes i just wish i can tell everybody face to face how i miss them, how i love them.

those tiny fragments of memories. this is what i am today.

emo

2010-08-12T20:53:00.003+08:00

i dont want to post emo stuff here.
haha cause this is not a place to emo, not for me to emo.
anyway these past few months have been a blast.
one semester is soon coming to an end and what amazing things have happened.

whatever will be will be, and it's no use regretting anymore.
no YOG no YOG lor. i stand no chance any way.
haha man.
i dont know why am i feeling so fatigued nowadays.
think because no hockey?

and pasir ris is a nice place.
make me so emo also. woop woop

1st august

2010-08-01T02:25:00.002+08:00

havent blogged for long.
because i dont know what im gonna say always.

i dont know what to say :(.
lost for words haha.
can never stop listening to geo jin mal.

and exams are coming, i don't know whether i fear it or im just not prepared.
come on man ct.

and its time to show that i will keep to what i say, and i will ask again much later on. i won't give up :D. although i am such a failure at this :(, being so lame and childish ++

ELATED. and in a way particularly annoyed

2010-07-24T21:33:00.003+08:00

im so over the moon today.
after dry 9 hours of the umpiring course, farhan, Jayjay, azlyn and me are finally certified trainee umpires. hahahaha feel so great.
and today's division 2 3-0 win felt so good. singapore hockey is going to regret not getting syamirul in the YOG squad. he said he will be better than me, and there he goes. so happy for him and yet it drives me to improve further, matching his level.
lets continue with this great run boys. wooooooooooo. every week should feel like this ^_^.

and yes! i am particularly annoyed.
annoyed because a person in my class, who has hit his twenties, is being so childish and bitchy about people he call bitches. he thinks he is king in class, he complains and whines like a girl and he demands respect with whatever he do. what an annoying idiot right? why he want to become cyber warrior like me and post about his hates on facebook? (hahaha thats right im a cyber warrior). and by the way, he is discriminating religion by posting that on facebook. oh man what a fool.
i like her, and i will support her allllllll the way.
but even if i don't, i'd still oppose you. i won't become your dog, i won't become a person who respects you. YOU DISGUST ME

so long haha

2010-07-19T23:16:00.002+08:00

so long never post.
i dont know what to post really.
but this past few weeks have been full of fun and sadness.
sadness because econs project is so * up.
fun because
- div 2 win
- my birthday passed with cool people celebrating it
- keep going hockey seeing familiar faces perks me up
oh ya and 1 more sadness is because
c div boys, nvr even go quarter finals.
strong ah this year? forget it la. want go finals? forget it more.

ahhhhhhhhhhh but nvm looking forward this saturday now
next match + umpire course. woop woop time to become a cool umpire and gain some cash.
and woop woop syamirul is back! now for rahim turn after YOG :D. woop woop div 2 top 4 here we come.

AND EXAMS 1 MONTH 10 DAYS MORE. GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

so much to say, so many people to thank, so grateful nonetheless.

2010-07-09T21:53:00.003+08:00

today has been a great day.
indescribable feelings.
looking at the collage that my class (well literally) made for me touched me to death.
receiving tons of wishes on facebook makes me wanna reply to one of them individually and thanking everyone. having a dinner with boon chong and oh liang was great, with banter abound :D. thank you.

im just lost for words right now.
i just feel contented right now.
i dont feel lonely :). i have friends, family, and maybe someone that i can relay all these feelings i have received to.

~~age ain't no barrier.~~

great!

2010-07-04T23:27:00.004+08:00

great day at felicia's house today.
had fun with alvin, felicia and rebecca though i wasn't part of their bizsw app group you know. hahahaha always shoot alvin.
ps ah alvin :). you know we love you HAHA.

fel's father was such a nice guy too. i think the whole family is nice. :D.

and im so elated i finally found adidas game spirit deodarant!!!!!!
i ve been looking for it for the past 2 years.
the smell reminds of so much things. and to think i found it at tampines, which reminds further of many other stuff.

muahahahahaha and next week comes in another 30 minutes time.
I CANT WAIT FOR IT.
IM ITCHING TO GET TO THURSDAY, FRIDAY.
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS :D.

and i finally understand how serangoon gardens residents must have felt when a foreign worker dormitory was built in a vacant school next to their residences.
i felt the threat today.
i felt the unsafe experience.

im gonna make sure my children learn wing chun in the future.
whack those foreigners who dare touch them!

im just so glad, and i just like bitching around.

2010-06-26T11:12:00.004+08:00

yesterday was a great day.
great rain brought about a great cool weather.

awesome attachment interview followed by bitching around about a particular guy and many other stuff.
unforgettable suki sushi dinner with the 4 of the great sec 2 friends
nice dream which i am going to aim for, and strive for.

and anyway, i just cant quit bitching about a particular guy.
he's just so lazy, he's just such a player, he's just so embodied in his dreams of becoming a performer and so on and so for.

but one thing for sure is, everyone whom i know is way better than him, and i'm glad that i am going to mark him down, and that i have completed way more projects than him.

haru haru + 거짓말 (Remix),

2010-06-20T23:19:00.004+08:00

i wish i was staying here.
not worrying about anything.
maybe not staying as a modern man, but a medieval age man.
something like the chronicles of ancient darkness from michelle paver.
like wolf brother, an animal as a companion.

condolences.

2010-06-18T23:20:00.002+08:00

i send my condolences.
losing a family member when a major exam is onto you aint something easy to take.
but i know she will pull through.

my mind has been screwing me up today.
i dont know whether to continue NYP floorball.
i just want to play hockey.
hockey is me, me is hockey.
and not other hockey, but twss brand of hockey.

i cant seem to adapt.
my mind tells me to be strong.
lets pull through man.
july is coming up, and this is the month where everything happens.

im gonna do it.
im just gonna do it.

2 weeks

2010-06-11T18:18:00.003+08:00

today is the start of a 2 weeks break.
what a relief.
at least i can rest well for 2 weeks, and i cant wait for july.

why july?
its because july is something special for me.
presentations in july, which i look forward to.
i cant wait to get my ipod touch in july too.

and man, lets do it CT.
time to get..

thank g-dragon its friday

2010-06-04T21:39:00.003+08:00

TGIF. thats my definition ontop.
its quite a short week this week.
with some tests here and there
i guess im pretty screwed in Microsoft access Q&A.

3 projects to be handed in by july, which is my birthday month.
POA and access test next week. this is like so eff up.

im having late nights lately due to relieving stress by gaming, through starcraft 2 and dota. and im sleeping pretty soundly in lectures nowadays.

ah i cant i cant i cant.

everyday is a great day.

2010-05-28T01:08:00.003+08:00

everyday is a great day.
and life is like a rollercoaster ride.
i think i am going uphill now, soon at my peak.
i dont know when will i fall again, but lets make this like macroeconomics.
maturity stage for a very long period of time.

i am damn tired now.
division 2 starts in a month.
i hope i get my F1 attachment, and the rest of 5 classmates get it too

i dont know when should i ask. what a noob man haha. i ve been so slackkkkk nowdays la, and ICA is like next week.
so everybody say GG and smile for the webcam on your laptop

sleep,

2010-05-24T20:20:00.002+08:00

i can study but i look at my bed and i feel more and more sleepy.

slacking.

2010-05-21T10:10:00.003+08:00

ytd was a nice gym session with joy, cheryl and wee teng.
after our workout, we slacked for 3 hours and talked about our lives.
what great friends haha.

this week was a good week.
but cant say really good because today need go the effective writing skills -.-.
oh yea i cant wait to be an umpire. i better submit my application now if not too late.

starting with a dream

2010-05-16T19:11:00.004+08:00

love for me always start with a dream.
and im gg with that.

ytd's training was (Y), though manjit wasn't there.
i just hope the C div pull off something this year, especially with the strong squad we have.

coming to my poly life, i have a feeling it's getting more fun as the days go by.
and i must tell my self that i cant judge a book by its cover.
and furthermore, everyone has the same dignity although we have different statuses in life.

so im gonna have a more +ve outlook on life.
and this time i am really going to try to make that dream come true.
no more secondary school style shyness + humjiness.

this is the new me.
this is the revamped me.
with a whole lot of ME still inside.

what a rhythm man.

i cant live without twss style of hockey. friends and such

2010-05-10T20:56:00.002+08:00

this sucks.
whenever there is no hockey for a month, memories start flowing back.
how i had so much fun in secondary 2.
looking at the c div now, i kinda miss the times we had.

we had so much fun.
but theres not much photos to capture these sweet memories.
im glad the current c div did that.
so when they are my age they wont forget that only friends from hockey are true and the best.

i really miss hockey.
my life wont be complete without them.
i d said half of my heart goes to hockey.
and not any other people's hockey, but TWSS.

hehe

2010-05-03T19:26:00.002+08:00

lol recently i ve been seeing a lot of my primary school friends yo.
and guess what.
they are all taller than me. i feel so short now. what is the world coming to.
and friday's gathering with two a lil short girls and 4 about-the-same-height as me guys was good.

lol i was lazy to plan for the outing because i felt that there is no need to.
but after that event i learnt a very good lesson :E.
so everyone shall give me a 3rd chance to prove my worth again muahahaha.

i underestimated thai express's SPICY PHAD THAI WHICH WAS 3 CHILLIES SYMBOL WORTH.
after like 2 mouths i was drenched in my own perspiration i felt like i was working out.

and people change man, people change.. last time they dont do that, now they do that because of they just want to be with the group.

and poly should be getting exciting woo! but mondays always suck because of one guy called sam woo whom i shall not elaborate or introduce to you guys.

and i found a wallet in the MRT train on the way to YCK today. i went through the documents and realized it belonged to a foreign worker. so i became very magical today and promptly passed the wallet to the control station at YCK, and HOPEFULLY it gets back to that poor foreign worker whose wallet slipped out of her pockets

samwoo

2010-04-26T22:24:00.002+08:00

haven blogged for long.
been dam busy.
so i shall just shorten it.

1)business software applications is boring cause of sam woo
2)i cant join sprint kayak because of commitments to hockey
3)1st year poly life aint that exciting like we all expected in secondary school
4)sorry alvin kang
5)ravin isnt a sex maniac, its just some crazed hacker.
6)18/4/10 BBQ AT ECP WITH CLASS 6P WAS GREAT
7)starting to know more friends so thats great
8)LASTLY. I WANT TO FUCKING RUN CAN? ALL OF YOU WHO CAN RUN/SPRINT TREASURE YOUR LEGS, I WOULD KILL TO HAVE YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW.

hockey final.

2010-04-18T10:53:00.003+08:00

i have never ever played in a final of a major hockey tournament, like under-18, b-boys.
if i ever do i would put my life on the line to win it.
and if i ever win it i want to dedicate the win to the late amirul.
he would be happy.
if i ever win it i want to kiss the hockey pitch once, and forever remembering the moment.

and let it not be with other clubs, but with only the team from TWSS.
and man i can't wait for school to start?
omgomomgomgomg

orientation

2010-04-15T22:37:00.003+08:00

i seriously like the first day of orientation.
i dont know why but i think i like making new friends, and getting to know them too.

life's not about looking backward, it's about going forward.
i am very happy because i seem to have forgotten about what happen 2 weeks ago, 3 weeks ago.
maybe friends like them are just meant to stay friends, not to share each other perspectives on something.
and i am contented with it.
as long there is contact, i am contented.
as long there is no hate, no backstabbing, i am contented.
as long we continue doing what we like together, e.g dota, i am contented.

i can't seem to bother about being asked out anymore.
so lets continue going forward.

goalkeeping

2010-04-14T22:09:00.002+08:00

coaching my the goalkeepers, i came across a training routine which brought back lots of memories.

flash back to 2007, sometime around june.
it was the match against raffles in the c div.
we had nothing to lose being up against them.
in the first half we were up 1-0, thanks to amirul's(26) [i still rmb his old number haha] goal. deep into the second half, timothy hit the ball at blazing speed, and i seemed possessed at that time, because i didn't remember much of what i did, except that my friends told me that i did a full body dive. i just cant picture it mannnnnnnnn what memories.
flash back to 2008, sometime around september.
going to national training was shit but i learned how to learn the high dive, like what i did in 2007. lots of memories. go delta, come back shag like siao.

hahahahha tmr orientation la, i hope i meet nice people, and i am going to start being nicer lol

Courage is.

2010-04-10T13:58:00.002+08:00

courage is : being afraid to do something, but still doing it.

i am always afraid to buy DR in dota, but i still do it sometimes.
i am always afraid to put on extra weight on the weights bar, but i still do it.
i am always afraid to say something from my perspective, but i still do it.

orientation is coming, school is starting.
cannot wait leh. how.

aiya

2010-04-04T14:43:00.002+08:00

smoking really sucks.
and i am not trying to force people not to smoke.

but in my opinion smoking is equivalent to smelling shit, and although i was not forced by them to smell shit with them, i really sympathize with them because there are many other forms of de-stressing methods out there. why turn to smoking at such a young and illegal age? we have tried many times to tell them to quit smoking but the same old excuse come out every time.

and yes i don't think i might ever touch a cigarette in the future, because i have a sporting lifestyle and i have aspirations to continue with SPORTS. theres no SMOKE in Sports. theres no SMOKE in hockey. theres also no SMOKE in life.

i don't know about the rest, but if they want to continue smelling shit and harming their bodies, so be it la hor. i just try to avoid them and talk to them only when they ask me questions, so i won't be much of a bloody snob.

i have my own negative attributes like gaming too much, getting frustrated easily, and yes these acts easily garners detractors. but at least i know when to stop, i know what is right from wrong.

and it's all in the mind. if later on in life you go through a difficult stage, smoking isn't going to pull you through, alcoholism isn't going to pull you through, neither does consumnation of drugs is going to pull you through. its what the mind tells you to, and if you don't have a steel mind, you are going to succumb to negative influences of say, peers.

a hot afternoon run

2010-04-02T13:32:00.002+08:00

everybody has their own lives and ideals, and i shouldn't bother them because i am always busy and i must know that a person does not understand you fully all the time, so i must stop whining why my friends often dont ask me out, and ask me for dota, so yes i hope this clears my mind. furthermore, i have become more of a gamer, and its a good thing because i can do more hockey, and honing my skills in mw2 and bc2. so thanks people.

and anyway, an afternoon run in the scorching hot sun is really crazy.
the heat takes all the oxygen away from you and makes you push your limits.
and i really really hope my damned shin is alright. !!!!

yes!!!!!!!!!!

2010-03-25T23:50:00.002+08:00

i can finally FINALLY run without feeling any pain in my shin.
FIRST SHIOK.
12 win streak in modern warfare 2 with my clan.
SECOND SHIOK.
i learnt some new coaching techniques for my keepers.
THIRD SHIOK.
poly starting soon
FOURTH SHIOK.

SO TODAY IS SHIOK DAY. HAHAHAHAHAHA

humble

2010-03-24T22:47:00.002+08:00

ok im peeved.
because of one sec 5 NA guy.
a bit a bit also complain about the pull up bars in school.
"pull up bars rusty, pungent smell when touch..."
cock la. you go army you tell your officer this, saturday sunday you no need book out.

and by the way, i dont understand why some guys like him want to sell themselves by posing pictures of themselves looking muscular and "sapau".
so what if you have 6 pecs? so what if you have strong arm muscles?
i reckon you cant even do what i am doing everyday. lameeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
some more what, challenge pull up.
just because you think i look fat i cannot win you in pull up? wake up your idea la boon shong (not boon chong dont get it wrong)

i put your name because i dare and wont hide from anyone. lameeeeeeeeee

30-1.

2010-03-23T00:18:00.002+08:00

today is such a great day.
twss pwned serangoon gardens c boys floorball 30-1.
like wtf??????????????????????????????????????????????????????
i couldnt believe my ears when i heard from one of them.
me : " eh got win not?"
indra: "yes"
me : "how much?"
indra: "30-1" *gives me that innocent look lol*
me : *Stunned* " ok bye"

i think this is the batch that is gonna make twss boys proud man.
win the c boys, win the b boys. ON LA

IKAEEEEEE

david beckham. memories la.

2010-03-16T22:52:00.002+08:00

wa lao.
i really pity david beckham.
now he cant even represent his country in the South Africa World Cup finals because he broke his Achilles tendon.
and it would take minimum 4 weeks and maximum 20 weeks for him to fully recover.
a man who is so devoted so serving his country that he tries so hard just to make it onto the bench of the English team.
i really admire him la.
i wish he was young again.

looking at him, i look at myself and wished that i could be like him.
but first things first.
the singapore team in the first place doesn't have :
1) a good coach.
2) quality players ( quality as in having discipline, pride etc.)
i want to, but i don't want to because in the first place, if the coach shows favoritism in his choices, it ain't going to bring the team nowhere because he only selects these few players, and doesn't even expose the weaker players to the immense experience out there.

and aiya, hockey brings a lot of memories la hor.
talking with farhan and JJ i remember how bad the boys were at hockey, because we were the pioneer batch.
but look, over the years, twss improved so much in the C div.
2007 - quarters
2008 - semis ( with a medal of cause :/)
2009 - finals

yea i wish i could have won at least a medal while playing for my school, but i had not.
and it totally sucks.
you cant ask for much can you.

and hockey brings back a lot of memories too man, div 3, csc, u-21, 7-a-side..
and i think coach is right, i should care about my own life first because trying to care about other people's life, that is before 18.
having a girlfriend now ain't that good eh?
hockey has much better girls, i suppose. haha

bukit merah= long term floorball rivals.

2010-03-12T22:40:00.001+08:00

it seems the girls cannot seem to win bukit merah.
its ok man girls, we got to the finals, and you did your best.

and yes i got my laptop.
thank my bro, thank everyone in my family.
yes thanks

and i didnt say or think that having a laptop = god .

so f u man sy. -_-

recently

2010-03-07T01:47:00.003+08:00

very tired recently.
lol shit.
once my package came there were internal problems.
so fuck up.

why cant that person just fucking control his own attitude and self
i dont understand why.

but anyway, girls won the final 1-0, boys drew with coral 4-4, obviously out of the quarters.
but one thing i did not like to hear is that : " already cannot qualify, still want to win, draw can already la".
stupid mindset, thats why you cant qualify.
i dont want say name la hor, lest i offend anybody.

and i seem to have lost my touch in goalkeeping.
you know the world is sometimes unfair too.
i see some chiobus with some decent looking guys and i wonder if i look better than that guy. lol.
how to jio girl la how.
make her interested in messaging
how man how how how.
i shall ask the 5 wives and 1 husband about this question
(why who what when where and how)

i dont care eh eh eh eh eh

2010-02-22T20:54:00.002+08:00

2ne1 - i dont care.
2ne1 - last farewell.
wooooooooooo

TWSS FLOORBALL BOYS OWN.
4-0 DOWN TO 6-4 IN THE THIRD PERIOD, LAST 8 MINUTES.
LIKE WTF AHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

im feeling so much btr la, but bad news, i think you all will see me on crutches soon.
maybe its good news la hor. lol.
im out for another bloody 2 mths of training, SHIT! but hockey is still fun anyways.

mad

2010-02-21T01:30:00.001+08:00

i am going mad.

so long nvr blog.

2010-02-20T13:38:00.003+08:00

i was MIA from this blog for long.
but yea lets put positive things here alright.
yesterday's outing with shermaine, arena, faizal, boon was good.
i did what i wanted to do, and was kinda happy, but it started going downhill from there. lets not talk about it.

boon bought guitar hero, and several of us went to his house to have fun.
my singing not bad eh? haha.
watched percy jackson twice ( oh yea ), don't know what other movies i caught.

i don't wanna post pictures because firstly, i am lazy, and secondly, i am more lazier. lol.

and i want to get a good graphics card man! support battlefield bad company 2.

i realised, my life is full of fairness. i lose something, i gain something. i gain something, i lose something.
by losing her, i gain experience by being able to harness more confidence, resulting in me fulfilling what i wanted yesterday. its just like hockey, i lose the chance to win B' boys for the last time, i lose the div 2, i lose almost everything last year, but i gained something big in return, the sports boy award, maturity in the sport.

i don't know. all i want to say is, i want to say that i still love her, and moving RIGHT NOW is impossible, so please stop ranting about moving on, put your faith right where it belongs. because in my mind i just don't care, one-sided or not, this is
GOH CHANG TECK and you can never tell him what to do.

hockey - it is a sport which lightens me up whenever i feel down, just like this morning, where i couldn't get to sleep because of agonising memories flooding my head.

ps3, battlefield bad company 2.

2010-02-17T14:50:00.004+08:00

omg its like wtf, these two things are the wants in my life now.
like lol man
BC2, you should check out the graphics in youtube.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vepiJznvvY0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DLYdoodBh5w&feature=channel.

FUCK! I WISH I HAD AN INSANE GRAPHICS CARD TO CATER TO THIS KIND OF GAME.

ps3, battlefield bad company 2.

2010-02-17T14:50:00.001+08:00

woo!

gambling

2010-02-15T00:59:00.003+08:00

he who spends majority of his hard earned money on gambling is also he who suffers.
he who spends majority of his hard earned money on gambling is also he who lies.

i just dont see whats so appealing about gambling.
went to resorts world sentosa today.
nothing much there, because majority of the attractions weren't open, except for that so-called casino.
in my opinion, i feel that casino is an evil place.
i don't why people must gamble just to make themselves feel entertained.
i think this kind of people have fugging no aim in life.
gambling, is just not the way to go.
gambling shows you have lost focus in life, and that you are also addicted to it, no matter how much bullshit you may spill.

he who gambles suffers not, but he whole gambles bring suffering.
_|_. bad day to start cny. fuck it.

Blogging on my phone. Running again feels so good

2010-02-13T00:06:00.000+08:00

Blogging on phone is rather easy LOL. Cause i am like using free internet provide by my neighbour wi fi :) . Anyway today training was Shag for me because i sleep very little yesterday morning. Running for 15 minutes and running past those who have been doing training feels good man. Chinese new year eve today. I cant wait to eat steamboat man. I want to get a ps3 man, invite friends over and play modern warfare. And by the way, i dont like being branded outcast in front of public because it shows that the person who did this has no qualms about bringing down anothers self esteem in public. So yea . Anyway, happy Chinese tiger year all :) .

500th post. gonna be a long one.

2010-02-08T10:24:00.003+08:00

oh yes
i dont know whether it is a dream or what.
but the b boys are out of the b div.
losing 3-2 to northland.
losing 3-1 to seng kang.
why? the title is so bloody elusive.
nvm.

and yes. ytd was my first working experience.
two words.
bloody tiring!
but was fun nonetheless.
it felt like teck whye secondary school to me, because there were many faces that looked like : mr michael tan, alfred, boon bing, nicole, wei wen, and some GL people here and that. the foreigners who worked there were extremely friendly, so its like maybe i had the wrong thinking of them last time. :D.

and yea i kinda chatted with a china girl, who looked like nicole, and she thought i was from china.
lololololol, but shes pretty nice as she keep smiling at me LOL.

Losing

2010-02-02T23:05:00.003+08:00

lose
loss
lost
–verb (used with object) to suffer defeat or fail to win, as in a contest, race, or game

3-1 loss to sengkang.
losing every game we played this year.
hockey that is.
well maybe for some that is.
why cant we win in B boys.
we thought that this is our year.
but i will continue to have faith.

northland game on friday.
i dont know how.
im at a loss.
people would say you cant expect results in 4 years.
but the girls have shown so much in 4 years.
why cant we.
thats the only title thats eluding the teck whye squad.

im losing everywhere too.
lost so many times in modern warfare 2.
won pretty much today. am happy abit.
lost so many dota matches, but replaced it with some wins today.
i think it would come.
just like mw2 and dota.
patience.
faith.
mindset.

sengkang sec.

2010-02-01T19:44:00.002+08:00

today was a very bad floorball match for the boys.
though we won 8-3, it aint so much of a thrashing.
dont wana talk about it.

anyway, i saw some chio sec 1s in the new hockey batch.
sadly, i think they are gonna quit lol.
you know the percentage of chinese staying in the hockey team is about : 3 in 10.

tmr is the match against our bitter rivals.
i dont know whether i should go to school and watch it.
cause it seems that every match i watch tenses me up and maybe it would unknowingly spread to the boys too.
so go man.

good day.

2010-01-30T00:24:00.003+08:00

was good. nothing much to say, happy advanced bday to liqing and shiyi.

how time flies.
wish them luck in their o lvls. swee yang jie liang too.

so i finally prestiged in my modern warfare 2.
FINALLY man.

boys won evergreen 4-0.
wasnt good enough.
pick it up.

many twss going to sp, nyp.
NP hmm.
good luck there, hope you meet nicer people then me.

money.

2010-01-25T23:01:00.003+08:00

haiz.
money for me now can buy me a lot of things that i want and maybe need in the future.
thats why on wednesday my future again will be decided, and in that course i want to gain a diploma and maybe go to university and in the future earn big bucks, giving a large portion to my dad.
i wish i can do so now and support him with whatever i can earn.
cause i love him so.

floorball today was good.
won catholic high 6-4. teck whye are starting to grow very strong every game.
heard swiss cottage students saying teck whye look fierce in their black jersey.
lololol.

and i have a wish.
i wish i can run.
seeing those sec 1/2 students struggling to run, i wish i can have their shins and replace mine, just so i can run.
dam it when will it recover.
injured = cannot play game, cannot train, grow fat, grow unfit.

floorball. faith.

2010-01-20T19:09:00.003+08:00

so proud of twss, canberra.
twss b div girls and boys did a total thrashing of schools that have been in the floorball scene for years.
12-0 vs coral sec.(b-girls)
10-1 vs swiss cottage sec.(b-boys)
17-4 (canberra boys)
20-1 (canberra girls)

and i've been thinking hard rather lately.
im so neutral hahaha

so its hockey and floorball for me all the way to poly and end of poly.
no qualms about it.
LETS GOGOGOGOGOGO.

shin splint. mother FUCKING FEDERATION.

2010-01-18T09:59:00.004+08:00

i got a damn bloody shin splint.
have to abstain from running for 2 weeks. which is not good cause i am gonna get unfit.
i got a damn bloody flu.
have to keep blowing my nose because its very irritating to have it blocked.
which is not good because i cannot breathe properly.
all this equates to abstaining from sports.
which also equates to abstaining from hockey.
WTF RIGHT?!?!!??!?!??!!?!!?

i want to run one leh.
u-21 tournament underway some more.
nabei $(#@*#&*@@(*#((#!~

and one thing very cb.
singapore hockey. cannot go far because of some cock up governing body.
why the hell must they do last minute call ups?
especially when they didn't even showed an interest in attending trainings?
seriously.
if i had the means i would sue the federation till they went bankrupt.
what rule disallows them from playing in school tournaments?
they are taking away our only goalkeeper, our captain and vice-captain who can inspire the team.
like wtf?
so if they aren't selected they cant play for the school anymore?
i wish i can get a very detailed explanation from the very idiots who created this themselves.

acoustic. i want it

2010-01-13T19:59:00.001+08:00

haiz.

2010-01-13T11:49:00.001+08:00

i have finally come to realise that i love chinese songs a lot.
but, i dont understand 60% of what they are saying. LOL.
and my chinese still sucks.

the irony man.

12 points. :)

2010-01-11T23:23:00.001+08:00

woo!

im over the moon.
just cant get enough.
have so many people to thank.
and jay chou owns. :D.
NANYANG POLY HERE I COME.

and jialing i have not forgotten about the $50.
i will just let it go LOL.

布拉格广场 by jay chou.
dam nice lol.

jansenites.

2010-01-09T21:25:00.001+08:00

disappointing day today.
6-1 loss.
i let in a "through the pads" goal.
wtf.
i conceded 4 goals.
double wtf.
monday o' results.
triple wtf.
equates to omfgwtfbbq.
nvm life goes on. lol.

sleepless nights - insomnia. lol

2010-01-08T13:06:00.002+08:00

bloody hell.
i for two days cannot sleep already leh.
3 more days , and i think im gonna die.
so tired every single day because of this shit.
lame man lol.

NYP - BEST. SP - Good. NP - :(

2010-01-07T19:50:00.002+08:00

went to three open houses today.
last two of the open houses were just to snap up goodie bags. LOL.
NYP had the best goodie bag of all.
a "leather" bag.

asked many questions about the course i want too.
NYP is for me. rarararararararararara

dream.

2010-01-06T12:56:00.001+08:00

had a very weird dream two nights ago.
with a motto.

and i am gonna follow it.
what an inspiration.
my dreams are getting weirder by the night lol.
i dream i was in sky island yesterday. woo.

first day of school.

2010-01-04T20:21:00.002+08:00

i didnt go.
because i dont have to.

lots of changes to the school.
the principal... im speechless.
i was right all along. LOL.

well, spoke to miss fong today.
hahahahaha, wish i could help her in her work, but cant lol.
heard miss ang teaching 3B again.
woo good luck with them find another zai president like me LOL. bhb ahahhaha.

and i want to talk about hockey B' DIV.
im speechless too - just because seeing them for 3 years, i cant believe how much improvements that have been implemented. last year the current sec 3's played like shit, and now they are almost unstoppable. gosh.

and im bent on going to NYP.
no matter what.
i am going to the open on thursday.
anybody keen on tagging along?
im fine with it :D

First post of the year.

2010-01-01T11:41:00.003+08:00

ah. sent off leibing and delicia to korea at the airport.
seems fun to go on a big group tour.
wished i was going too. lol.

celebrated new with the gayboys too.
that was one of the last pictures for 2009.
lets start this year with a bang.

a new target for me, a new perspective. :D

Moments of 2009

2009-12-31T10:10:00.005+08:00

ah.
finally its 10:11AM.
couldn't get to sleep today.
played PS2 in the morning to make myself tired.

so well.
i shall start.
happy new year's eve, and here goes.

2009
an extreme tough year for me.
ups and downs, mostly downs. roller coaster ride for me.

January
started Sec 4 with an aim.
win the B div. get shermaine by 24 november. i know - hilarious. lol.
things looked bright for me. lost out in the quarter-final of U-21.
3-1. never mind. next year looms ahead.

February
2 bbqs this month.
extremely fun.
february 18 was my dream day. i was in wonderland. couldn't believe my eyes, ears.
february 20, things started to look bad, lost to saints 3-0. and the following day..
you know.
Chalet this month.
super fun.
can never get enough.

March
suckish month.
struggled through it.
lost to jurong west 1-0.
lost to northland 3-0.
drew with raffles 0-0.
still trying to get over the shit.

April
things started to pick up.
picked up roller skating to try to relieve my stress.
get my head off stuff. hockey trainings toning down.
april 28, arena's birthday :D. dont know what i got for her lol.

May
couldn't remember much of this month.
mid-year exams.
studying and stuff. d n t getting to be a pain in the ass.

June
planning for my birthday BBQ.
was hoping she'd turn up.
hard luck.
d n t was shit this month.
redid my whole fucking product.
d n t camp totally rocked though.

July
good month.
my bbq was a great success.
have to thank many people in my class, other classes.
division 2 was starting.
lots of birthdays this month.
leibing
mine
frederick
nicholas
aliff
dont remember much
x-country this month.
got top 10(6th) this year.
didn't achieve top 5.

August
august was a pain.
due to the fucking d n t.
i cried doing it.
f up solidworks.
after i completed, i swore never to touch it again.

September
touching up of d n t.
still a pain in the arse.
div 2 coming to an end with 1 or 2 walkovers.
was growing fat right here :(.

October
O levels was starting soon.
getting pumped up for it.
studying, going out.
classes, going out.
fun month

November
the month of sorrows.
O levels in full swing.
A maths buang.
D n t theory buang.
gosh.
Prom night.
24 november, failed.
chalet this month too.
more of a friends chalet.
jialing cooked her best.
think she next time become good house wife lol.
wild wild wet was fun too.
ran through the park half naked. HAHAHAHAHHA

December
decided to stick to hockey instead of working.
my passion, my love.
and by the way i ain't getting bribed by my coach just for going for his trainings.
rotting at home everyday with modern warfare 2 and dota by my side.
wish i could get a girlfriend. sounds desperate. or maybe hanging out more with my friends.
canceled primary school friends outing. fuck it yet again.

All the months
went out bowling countless times, watched countless of movies, did a naruto parody, took many photos. so much memories. so much has been etched into this year. i love everyone. so what if we our class kept insulting qiu xia and kia shiang and everything.
thats what brings the class together. hahahahaha.
2010 - a new year, a new start, new friends, new emotions, new stuff, new everything.
cant wait to get a ps3. cant wait to watch the B' boys win the B' div.
there was something fun out of d n t too. the time we spent together talking, making jokes with teachers. can never get enough.
wish we all could be 16 forever right?

the year is coming to an end.
i feel i have not achieved anything.
so i have a resolution for next year. which is tomorrow.
it won't be very demanding.

1) stop struggling to get the girl i really want because it sucks the life out of me.
2) win at least 1 title in hockey.
3) get the course i want in NYP.

2010 soon.

2009-12-30T21:55:00.002+08:00

tmr i shall post moments of 2009.
3rd year straight doing so.

i feel so happy after today's steamboat.
gathered with my friends and enjoyed yet again.
looking forward to more of this.

thanks JL for helping too. you know. during eating.
thanks leibing for cutting stuff here and there.
and thank you the rest for coming to enjoy.
money well spent.
welcome back goat from taiwan, you know i never meant it when i say you should have died lol. thank you victor for the beef(s). thank you boon/hum for the balls. boon you still owe me $30, before new year cannot owe ppl things.

hahahahahaaahah FUN DAY.

dedication.

2009-12-28T23:15:00.001+08:00

a song dedicated to you

YES YES

2009-12-28T21:19:00.004+08:00

tournament season is coming soon YES.
listening to "man with the machine gun" PUMPS ME UP MAN.
U-21.
YES MAN COME ON PEW YOU WEET
PEW PEW PEW.

piang,
i want a ps3
i want to learn jap
i want to learn guitar
i want to do splits( STRUGGLING FOR BLOODY 2 YEARS)
i dont want to get myself struggling to get a girl i want NEXT YEAR because it sucks the life out of you.
all i want to say is
i finally found out who that personal message was for and.. sorry.

this week.

2009-12-27T01:41:00.001+08:00

this week is a damn boring week.
although i went for buffet with bc and faizal.
it aint enough.

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh 3 more mths of holiday, i think im gona die.

boa

2009-12-21T20:47:00.000+08:00

she sings korean, she sings japanese, she sings english.
what more can you ask for.

cant do without any of them

2009-12-19T19:12:00.002+08:00

i took a walk through my neighbourhood's pasar malam that was set up recently.
after a mere 5 minutes walk, i felt that i cannot be alone man.
i think over this holiday, i become very emo man, easily think very deeply into things and have wild thoughts that come racing into your mind whenever the thoughts feel like it.

so i had this one thought while walking home.
"i dont feel like walking home but i want to go home".
so i think i am gonna invent a teleportation machine to solve this thought/temptation of mine.

and, i cannotttttttttt do without hockey or my friends or my family.
or else i will effing emo. hockey brings laughter, friends bring more laughter, family brings joy.
ahahahahhahahahah shit.

by the way, whenever i walk, there are always moments of embarrassment or excitement in the memories i have. like for example, walking through the zhenghua primary school gate 3 bus stop, i stop to remember that i took a bus to causeway point with my friend to catch harry potter chamber of secrets. lol.

breathe

2009-12-17T11:47:00.000+08:00

I CAN BREATHE, HA HA HA
F LA LOL, shit man ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

MW2, JL

2009-12-17T11:40:00.002+08:00

i think you all better get ready to call me professional shooter in modern warfare 2.
i owned this morning in 3 games man. woohoo. 24-8, 15-5, 13-12. thats the score i rmb.

and shit shit shit shit shit shit shit.
i think I GG
come on JL we are friends so long surely you wont anyhow go tell right lol.
come on man 我们是好朋友，几年了， so keep it to yourself LOL.

come on JL for my sake T_T i treat you abalone on steamboat day lololol.
depends la hor. :D

tell me 5 good things about smoking.

2009-12-13T22:45:00.003+08:00

I got an LG crystal today.
pew you weet. absolutely elated.
but as i told you, happiness can be short-lived.

went to humphrey's house for steamboat, and was surprised at the rate people change.
why resort to smoking? i would like to understand what are the benefits from smoking.
seriously. from my point of view, if i had friends who are smokers, i would gladly respect them, but not when they nonchalantly smoke in front of me. so please, wake up your idea.

so in the end, i am definitely not happy today.

quah ting wen

2009-12-12T14:39:00.003+08:00

for those of you who DONT EXACTLY KNOW who is quah ting wen, let me give some fast facts.
she is a 17-year-old girl from RJC who is a national swimmer for singapore, and she has won 5 gold medals in the SEA games which have been going on until now. by the way, each SEA games gold medal brings S$10000. so its like she would be known locally, but i dont see it.

really la i dont understand why some singaporeans dont even recognise their local athletes whose faces are splashed all over the papers or the internet.

thats why locals like quah ting wen wont get recognized, and foreign talents only gain all the fame. but its alright, foreign talent are also essential to singapore's growth.
we wouldn't have got our second olympic medal without them.

and i think hor, i still have some little feelings for you know.. but nah its not so worse like early part of the year liao. cant say lifes a bitch either, saw a video of a guy who has no lower body part but he still lives on happily. and i think lets not bother about that thing recently im having. its stupid and naive of me. fooooooooooooooooooooooooooooolish man